Happy New Year from NDT!

In this episode, Meg reflects on three years of living alcohol-free and the transformative impact it's had on her life and relationships. From rebuilding trust with herself and her children to discovering the joy of self-validation, every step has been a revelation. 
With the support of a vibrant community and the power of coaching, Meg has turned distant dreams into reality. Join Meg as she shares insights from her six-year journey toward alcohol freedom, emphasising the importance of persistence, community, and incremental growth. 
This podcast is filled with hope, inspiration, and stories of personal transformation—reminding us that every small step counts and that freedom is within reach. Let’s embrace 2025 with gratitude, joy, and the simple pleasures of a life lived with intention.

MEG

Web: https://www.meganwebb.com.au/
Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/meganwebbcoaching/
Unwined Bookclub: https://www.alcoholfreedom.com.au/unwinedbookclub
ConnectAF group coaching: https://www.elizaparkinson.com/groupcoaching
Sober Summit FREE ticket: https://soberlifecollective.spiffy.co/a/wZETXqkEdk/3495


BELLA

Web: https://isabellaferguson.com.au
Insta: @alcoholcounsellorisabella
Bi-Yearly 6-Week Small Group Challenges: Learn more: https://www.isabellaferguson.com.au/feb-2025-challenge
Free Do I Have A Drinking Problem 3 x Video Series: https://resources.isabellaferguson.com.au/offers/JTFFgjJL/checkout
Free HOW DO I STOP DRINKING SO MUCH Masterclass: https://resources.isabellaferguson.com.au/offers/7fvkb3FF/checkout
Online Alcohol Self-Paced Co...

Chapters

• 1:34 Reflecting on Three Years Alcohol-Free
• 15:22 Journey to Alcohol Freedom

Transcript

Speaker 1: 1:34

Hi everyone. It's Meg here and I thought I'd pop in and do a really quick pre-New Year's Eve episode. I was going to put up a replay but I decided no, I'd jump on, I'd celebrate how far I've come. That's something I'd love to do at the end of each year and I'd I want to celebrate you guys too. I want to celebrate that you're listening, that you're making a change in your life and, whether or not you are drinking alcohol or not, the fact that you're listening, the fact that you're here and you are taking responsibility, is huge.

Speaker 1: 2:08

Part of the reason that I am actually coming up to three years alcohol free this New Year's Eve, and part of the reason for that success is looking at the gains, looking at my wins, because if I don't set a time to actually go over and look at them, I tend to forget and the negative takes over, which I'm sure many of you can understand. The negative self-talk we have is really loud and most of our thoughts in a day are negative rather than positive. So we have to really train ourselves to focus on the more positive side, and I don't mean oh, everything's wonderful positive, I mean looking at how far you've come, acknowledging the small steps that you've taken, acknowledging that you're in a different place to last year, acknowledging that by listening to this you are changing your neural pathways, all those sorts of things. For me, I can acknowledge that I truly do not worry about what people think of me anymore. Now that's massive, and for years I've known that, oh, don't worry what people think. But from the work I've done in the last three years, I truly believe it. Now I can see that it's probably only been the last six months that I've started to really see how effective it is to not worry what other people think. And the only way I've got there is from all the self-healing and the work I've done in the last three years. I've got there is from all the self-healing and the work I've done in the last three years. So that's a huge thing for me to reflect on as well as I'm learning to trust myself. I'm learning to love myself.

Speaker 1: 3:47

Now, these are things that are going to take time, but when I look back at the last year or the last three years, I can see how I really am changing my relationship with myself and that is a huge gain. Also in the last year, I can see that my kids are trusting me. I am there for them so much more than I was a few years ago, and I can see that they're calmer and happier around me, so that's another huge gain for me. I've also completed three groups through this Naked Mind, where I coached for a year in each group, and that was incredible. The amount I have learned in this last year by doing that is huge, and also the people I got to meet has been life-changing to me. Now that is such an incredible gain.

Speaker 1: 4:42

I could not have imagined that. I couldn't have imagined that three years ago, like that was not on my radar, and neither was having a podcast where we're well over a hundred episodes. We're in the Apple top 50 for self-improvement. I mean, these are things that I didn't foresee. I did not even have them in my goals for my life up until I did stop drinking, and they're just things that the pieces of the puzzle have come together over the last few years. So so I'm stopping to reflect on that too and just to feel so blessed that I get to do this.

Speaker 1: 5:21

Does this mean my whole year has been great? No, I have moments, just like everyone else, and I have struggles, and I've got quite a few at the moment, but I deal with them differently and very occasionally I think it would be nice to block them out, but there's no way I would do that. I know now that the result of using alcohol to block out a problem makes the problem worse. There's no doubt in my mind about that. I also have all the tools I use, so if I do feel low or anxious or worried about something, I can work through that, and that has been life changing. I've created memories that I remember. I mean that's huge and I've made new friendships, which is really really exciting, and I've strengthened some old friendships as well. So end of the year is just a really good time to reflect on how far you've come, and it's particularly useful if you're stuck in a bit of a cycle of you know I'm still drinking, I'm not having success. Have a look at where you were last year or where were you before you listened to the first podcast. Are you more open now? Are you thinking about having a break? What has changed for you? Are you more aware when you're drinking? These are all really massive gains and we've got to start somewhere and this is a process that is baby steps. So really acknowledge those baby steps. So, like I said, this New Year's Eve will be my third year alcohol free. It'll be my three year anniversary.

Speaker 1: 7:04

I'm, at this point, not doing anything for New Year's Eve, and that is absolutely fine by me. It will depend what my son does. He's 15. He wants to go out. I don't want him to, so it could be that I'm just trying to keep him home and make that exciting. But I don't miss New Year's Eve big parties, in fact, I really don't recall ever having a good one. They were always messy. I could never get home after them. I mean, that's another gain being able to drive everywhere. That is so good. Not having to wait for an hour at 1am or midnight on New Year's Day to get home just to get a train or a taxi or whatever it was, oh, and the amount of money I've saved because of that Huge but yeah, my three years.

Speaker 1: 7:54

I want to thank everyone that's listened to this podcast because you have helped me in that journey. You have given me a reason to embrace this journey I'm on and to share it. And in sharing it I feel stronger. And I keep doing this because I know how much it helps other people and I know how much it helps myself. So thank you to you and thank you to Bella, who is my partner in crime, and both of us are here to help you too.

Speaker 1: 8:23

Maybe you're interested in stopping drinking on New Year's Eve, like I did, or maybe you want a clean start in January or February. Well, both Bella and I offer programs, one-on-one coaching. We have all sorts of things on offer to help you. I could not have done this alone. That I know for sure. So you can find information about us on our websites Bella's is isabellafergusoncomau and my website is glassfulfilledcomau. We have different things group coaching, courses, individual coaching. I have a book club. We've got things that are running constantly and they offer community connection and coaching the three things that have been life-changing for my journey.

Speaker 1: 9:13

And maybe you just want to keep listening to the podcast, and that is fantastic. We absolutely love our listeners. We love getting feedback from you. Please let us know if there's episodes you'd like us to cover next year. We'd love to delve into anything that's of interest to you guys. So please reach out to us and let us know. And I just thought I'd give you some tips for New Year's Eve. So one tip I have for stopping drinking now really, really hard, as we know.

Speaker 1: 9:45

And if you are still struggling to get that first day under your belt, I want to tell you about something called embrace the suck. It pretty much sums up how I got through that first night. I just had to embrace the fact that it was going to suck and it was going to be depressing and hard and miserable, and it was. But I knew that. And so by knowing that it was going to feel like that, I also knew that it wasn't going to always be like that. So that was going to be my night one, because that was where I was having trouble getting to, and so on that New Year's Eve three years ago, I just embraced the fact it was going to be pretty crappy and it was yucky. It felt really uncomfortable. My sleep was horrible, but I got through it. And then, waking up knowing I'd done night one, oh, the momentum that that built. You know it was so much easier for me then to go on to the next night.

Speaker 1: 10:55

I also had a plan. You know I planned that that was going to be my last day. That worked for me. That does not work for everyone. You don't have to have a big date. You don't even have to count your days. For me, I did want a big date. I did want to count my days and I did plan for it. So I also planned to have a good dinner, nice dessert, watch a good movie and go to bed early. I always like reading, so I took a book to bed and it was like I said it wasn't great, but I knew it wasn't going to be. And it got easier after that because I had that momentum. But if you can embrace the suck and know that that feeling is not going to last, that can be really helpful in getting through that first night.

Speaker 1: 11:44

Now, if you have nearly stopped and you're worried about New Year's Eve, there's a couple of things I can give you tips on. So first of all, pick and choose. You don't have to do anything you don't want to If it would protect you and your alcohol. Freedom to not go somewhere. Don't go. Have a night at home. You know you can watch something on TV, the fireworks, or have some friends over or do something where you don't feel it's risky. Protecting your sobriety is number one and I did that for a long time. I still do pick and choose, because I will always put myself first in social situations.

Speaker 1: 12:23

Another tip is leave early, you know, if you feel uncomfortable. If you do go and you feel uncomfortable, leave. Or if you feel that people are getting messy, leave. Or if you feel a bit tempted, leave, have a plan to leave, drive if you can and make an exit. I mean, I've left quite a few things. Maybe I've told one person, but I haven't made a big deal of it. Most people had no clue I'd left and I got out of there early.

Speaker 1: 12:53

Another idea is, when you get there, grab a glass and fill it with something a soft drink, a mocktail, whatever it is. So you've got a drink in your hand. So you don't get that uncomfortable. What do you want to drink? You know. Be prepared in that way. If that's something that helps, you have a good excuse ready. I'm driving, I'm on antibiotics, I'm doing a dry January, whatever it is. Have the excuse ready, because most people will let it go if you say something like that Eat before you go out.

Speaker 1: 13:23

I cannot stress enough how much feeling full stopped me drinking. I was a big eating is cheating fan back when I was a drinker, so doing the opposite really worked for me Eat before you go out, eat as soon as you get there, whatever it looks like, but fill yourself up so that you're not going to feel like drinking. That might not work for you, but it is something that worked for me. If you're kind of on the fence about drinking, do some lengthening. Get there and if you were going to reach for a drink, wait half an hour. I mean, even if you wait 10 minutes or an hour, whatever it is, lengthen that time before you have that first drink. That's a really good tool that you can use. Going forward, you know, lengthening, making it maybe five minutes one day, 10 minutes the next, build up until you're not having anything to drink, but at an event, lengthen it, give it half an hour before you have that drink and, lastly, play it forward Again. That was a massive tool for me, you know.

Speaker 1: 14:20

Play it forward past that first hour of feeling good, feeling happy. What happens after that For me? By the second hour I was getting pretty, pretty tipsy, starting to say some silly things. By the third or fourth hour I was over that. I'd crossed that line. I was pretty messy and nothing got better after that. It went downhill.

Speaker 1: 14:45

Then I would wake up in the night feeling like shit, you know, really angry at myself and sleeping terribly. And then I would wake up in the night feeling like shit, you know, really angry at myself and sleeping terribly. And then I'd wake up in the morning, hungover and just beating myself up. So I played that forward. I don't want to feel like that. So if I went out to a party or something and I was in two minds, I'd just play it forward after an hour or two. It's not going to look good. Minds, I just play it forward. After an hour or two it's not going to look good, it's going to start to look bad and the next day is going to be horrible, etc. Etc. So use that as a tool If you're going out on use even you're not sure if you're going to drink or not. Play it forward.

Speaker 1: 15:22

But other than that, just keep on plugging in, keep on doing the work, keep on listening, plugging in, keep on doing the work, keep on listening, keep taking small steps towards your goal of alcohol freedom, of freedom from alcohol. As someone that has been doing this process for about six years, I've been alcohol free for three, so I've been where you are. I know what it feels like, and I know that it is possible to have freedom from alcohol. So keep listening, keep engaging online in communities, keep doing the work, keep listening to Quitlit books. It is all going to help you in this journey and have a wonderful new year. I hope 2025 is everything you want it to be, bella, and I wish you all a very happy new year and thank you. Thank you again for being our listeners and for supporting us and for just being amazing. Here's to 2025.